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Happy snowy Sunday!
Intimate Inquiries has exciting news! I am thrilled to announce that I am opening a branch office in Denver. I will be serving the Denver population starting Friday afternoons and Saturdays. Weekend wellness warriors welcome! Ready to work on your intimacy, mental health, relationship, and overall wellbeing, but the week days are too busy? Come visit me on Saturdays in Larimer Square to spend an hour dusting off the shelves of your beautiful minds. Please pass this on to anyone you may know who could benefit from my services in the Denver area. Scheduling: Monday - Friday morning in Niwot 376 2nd Ave Niwot, CO 80305 Friday afternoon- Saturday in Denver 1430 Larimer St. , Denver, CO 80202 As the fall transitions to winter, life routines adjust causing a disturbance in “the force”. What are the main issues you are grappling with this October? Email me with subjects you would like to hear about and I will feature them in my next newsletter. Wishing you all warmth and wellness! Auburn Meisner, LCSW, CST
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 What are the effects of porn on the developing mind and blooming sexuality of children? I have had parents and concerned spouses reach out to me, anxiously curious to see if the state of the internet is hurting their family.
The state of porn today has transformed drastically over the last 50 years. Take a journey back in time there are stories of how kids snuck into their parents Playboy or Penthouse magazine stash, or found a dusty VHS to play when they were home alone. These were the days when obtaining porn took planning, payment, and imagination to bring images to life in one’s minds eye. The once elusive playboys have been replaced by a ubiquitous ever expanding digital stockpile of porn. Today every human, young and old who has a smart phone, literally, has porn at their fingertips with a simple search and click. Dr. Alvin Cooper described the state of modern internet pornography as the triple A engine, its “accessible, affordable, and anonymous”. Why are kids clicking on such sites and what is the effect of this omnipresent porn machine on developing minds? In a society that shys away from talking about sex and pleasure as part of the sexual health conversation, kids are turning towards the internet to answer their taboo questions. To fill in the pleasure gaps between the reproductive sex-ed slides that warn against STD’s and pregnancy, kids are looking to porn to teach them how things work and validate their confusing urges that are generally shamed and shut down as dirty and inappropriate. Although porn has the potential to normalize sexual desire, fantasy and pleasure, it is not a suitable replacement for comprehensive sexual eduction for developing minds. Today there are growing trends of film makers creating ethical or feminist porn that portrays actors with all body, race, ad ability types, using consent and safety, but most mainstream free porn promotes unrealistic expectations of body proportions, gender roles, and positions. No one is telling the 12 year old that the average penis size is not 12.5 inches and that most women do not have double D breasts that defy gravity, nor do they portray what the mechanics of sex look like for most people. Parents and worried wives wonder; is porn addictive? Is internet pornography breaking my husbands, my sons penis? Currently there is not enough scientific evidence to definitively claim that watching pornography is addictive, however, binge watching porn can certainly negatively impact real life relationships. When the brain is accustomed to being hyper stimulated with images and videos for masturbation, it can lead to people having a harder time being aroused enough during reciprocal sexual acts that do not involve sexually explicit material. Most kids today grow up interacting with a screen and are extraordinarily fluent digital citizens. As parents and adults, modeling moderate use of the internet and technology is a huge first step to providing balanced habits for children. Talking to your kids openly and honestly about sex not only satiates their current questions so they are less likely to turn to google, but it also models that you are an ask-able, safe resource for their sex ridden questions. Parents must also discuss the power of the internet and help prepare their kids with the tools and a balanced perspective to responsibly navigate the porn logged internet landscape. It is unavoidable. Sooner or later kids will stumble upon porn and providing them with accurate information will help them make informed decisions about their personal porn use. Simply talking to your kids or your spouse with your full attention (no phone in hand nor computer near by), making eye contact and making conversation creates connection and shows a willingness to be vulnerable, real, and intimate. Here are some simple tools to arm yourself with to help protect you and your family from being negatively effected by porn:
Have you missed out on the having a good sexual education experience? Would you like to join two weekends of a fun, interactive, non-shaming, inclusive sexual education workshop this April? Now is your chance! Come join April 14th and April 21st at CU's Boulder campus from 1-3pm.  Paths, the Unitarian Universalist Student Ministry at CU-Boulder, is organizing a series of workshops using the Young Adult Our Whole Lives (OWL) Sexuality Education curriculum. The OWL curriculum itself is secular and holds a set of core values: self worth, sexual health, responsibility, and justice and inclusivity.These sessions are free and open to ANYONE, student or non-student alike, 18-35ish, including students from CU-Boulder and other campuses, community members, and folks from Unitarian Universalist communities.
Our Whole Lives - frequently referred to as OWL - is a lifespan sexuality education curriculum developed to help participants make informed and responsible decisions about their relationships, health and behavior. OWL addresses topics typically excluded from sexuality education and health classes, including sexual expression, identity, orientation, and life issues for young adults. OWL equips participants with accurate information, and teaches caring, compassion, respect, and justice. This year we are hosting the following themes led by Auburn R. Meisner LMSW and educator Ellen Duncan Location: C4C N215 Conference Room Time: 1pm-3pm April 14: Relationships, Love and Commitment April 21: Mind and Body: Sexual Pleasure and Fantasy Please fill out this RSVP (not-required, but appreciated) indicating which sessions you plan to attend. Any questions can be emailed to pathscu@colorado.edu What a success! Thank you to all who attended our workshop and The Niwot Inn & Spa for the beautiful space! Intimate Inquiries, LLC was honored and thrilled to host Dr. Betsy Cairo with Look Both Ways, Inc., an expert in reproductive health and excellent presenter for sharing her knowledge and passion for education parents and youth on reproductive health & making informed decisions.
  November marks the beginning of the holiday season rush. We are on the cusp of a cacophony of holiday music, tables full of filling feasts, and an overflow of holiday advertising and family cards in our mailboxes. Carols, candles, consuming of all kinds are commonly associated with this time of the year. For some, the holidays symbolize a time of joy, community, food and fun, while for others it is a sharp reminder of what they have lost or a bitter acknowledgment of what they may have but do not want.
As we shift into gear, be mindful to recognize that we all carry different stories and experiences, all significant and meaningful. Practice being mindful of never assuming, staying curious, and trying to be open- hearted to yourself and those around you. Invite a lonely friend over for a friendsgiving feast. Wrap a gift and give it to a local charity. Make a contribution to a foundation that supports a cause you are passionate about. Make a commitment to your health by attending your favorite activity throughout this time of gluttony. Be gentle with yourself and the people around you. Attend to the positive and actively turn away from the negative. What do you need this Holiday Season? Check out this article to contemplate your holiday intentions. Wishing warmth and contentment to you!
 Hello Intimate Inquirers,
Fall is in full swing as daylight savings shifted our schedules last week. The trees are more vulnerable in their leafless fashion, the temperatures are plummeting and the impending holiday fever is being blown in from the rockies. As autumn swallows the last of the summer season, other large shifts are underway. My Niwot Office for Intimate Inquiries will be out of commission for the month of November. For the next several weeks, I will be seeing clients at a satellite office in North Boulder. My new temporary address is 2475 Broadway Boulder, Colorado 80304. My schedule during this time of construction will be: Monday - Wednesday 2pm - 7pm Thursday 10am - 5pm. Contact me for directions, questions, and appointments. Your patience and flexibility is appreciated during this time of business evolution. Thank you for adjusting with this temporary inconvenience. Join me to Practice the Art & Science of Mental Hygiene Are you craving a calm mind and a more balanced outlook? Sign up for this 2 week intensive group! 2 Week Mindfulness Bootcamp Days: Tuesday & Thursday Dates: 7/18, 7/20, 7/25, 7/27 Time: 6-7:30pm Register now Happy Summer, I am thrilled to invite you to my upcoming mindfulness group startin this July. Come join this rigorous 2-week mindfulness group to gain effective tools to help you attain more mental and emotional health. Mindfulness can provide relief and help manage depression, anxiety, grief and stress. This group will leave you feeling restored, renewed and refreshed! This is an educational, process oriented group. This group will meet twice a week, Tuesday & Thursday evenings for two weeks. During these two weeks, participants will learn new mindfulness exercises, have accompanying resources, and gain practice exercising these skills and processing them in a group setting. What is it? This 2 week rigorous mindfulness group will provide effective tools to help you attain more mental and emotional health. Some key features include: • Attain more mental and emotional health • Manage depression, anxiety, grief, and stress • Learn easy & effective mindfulness tools • Accompanying resources to take home and practice This group will leave you feeling restored, renewed and refreshed! This is an educational, process oriented group that will be facilitated by Auburn Meisner, LMSW. Space limited to 8 participants. Dates: Tuesday & Thursday's on 7.18, 7.20, 7.25, 7.27 Time: 6-7:30 PM Location: 376 2nd Ave Niwot Colorado, 80503 Cost: $299 Early Bird $250 before July 4th Register Now › For More information Contact Me: 303-915-8900 Auburn@IntimateInquiries.com IntimateInquiries  Root Down to Spring Up  Illustration by Christopher Silas Neal Another winter has come and gone.
It is a beautiful bluebird day in Colorado. The days are stretching their arms growing longer with each sunset and the sun is melting the pristine snow into the earth, feeding the restless life waking from its winter slumber beneath Earth’s surface. As winter is tucking itself in and spring is slowly arising, a sense of transition is in the air. Spring is loaded with expectations of renewal, hope, life, and freshness. In order for our own growth to spring up through the surface and show itself in all of its glory, it is important to have rooted down into our strength, our own truth, and a compassion of self-acceptance of who we are. These roots remain unseen but are strongly felt. How do we get these strong roots? Some people are are blessed with strong roots due to functional, loving family life, health, and a positive perspective, others grow their roots with resilience, community support, and much tenacity in personal growth. These roots are our lifeline into our authenticity. They keep us rooted into our values, our identity and nourish our mind body and soul. When these roots are present and strong, it is easier to weather life’s storms with more ease and flexibility. When life brings storms of adversity and hardship, these roots will allow us to bend without breaking. 5 Tips to Strengthen your Roots in preparation for your Spring Bloom: 1. Know your internal compass and where it is pointing, then follow it! Take the time to explore your values and beliefs. What do you know is true for you? Define your values and align your actions with them. This will give you a sense of authentic integrity as you will be living a life that is in accordance with your personal truth. 2. Recognize when you are wondering far from your path, and gently re-direct. Bringing a sense of compassionate awareness will help you recognize when you are starting to get off route. The “compassionate” part is extremely important, as it allows you to objectively notice when you are getting off course without self-loathing and judgement. This gentleness is a practice of love and light rather than darkness and punishment. It is important to look at yourself with soft eyes and gently nudge yourself towards home. 3. Get into a ritual of self-care Find out what you need to feel good and do it. A universal prescription of eating healthy, getting regular exercise, getting adequate sleep, minimizing stress and optimizing relationships and purpose through work or school are a great place to start. Even slight changes can create major shifts in your life. Whether you take 15 minutes in the morning to sip tea quietly, do yoga, take a long shower, meditate, walk, call a friend or family member regularly, play music, make yourself a nice meal, schedule a social date, schedule a lone date, or read a book, find something that you can commit to. I ask people what is a “non-negotiable ritual” they already have in place. For me, I brush and floss my teeth every morning and night. Pick a time to do self-care and commit to doing it weekly (if not daily). 4. Show up Humans function best when we feel useful, needed, important and driven by a purpose. Whatever it is that you do, find purpose in it and show up. Sometimes getting to work or finding the energy to go to the gym or get in the mood for sex can feel daunting and overwhelming. Yet, once we get there we rarely regret the workout, the shared intimacy or fulfilling a role in which provides us with meaning. Find an environment that values you as a person as well as your skill set and start engaging in that environment. 5. Visualize what you want Figuring out what you want, where you want to go, who you want to be, and who you want to be with are extremely challenging and fun ventures. Exploring what it is that really makes you tick and creating a vision of what you want your life to look like will help you find the steps to get there. Knowing what you want is powerful. Having direction, focus, and drive will propel you to step into your best self. Knowing what you want is not always so simple, as it tends to be a moving target, shifting and changing as you grow. Knowing what you want is important but also having the flexibility to adapt and modify your goals as you and your vision evolve. For more information or support strengthening your root foundation, please call or email to schedule. intimateinquiries@gmail.com |
AuthorAuburn R. Meisner is a LMSW specializing in Sex & Relationship Therapy Archives
October 2018
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376 2nd Ave, Niwot, CO 80503
1430 Larimer Street, Denver, CO 80202
Copyright © 2018 Intimate Inquiries. All rights reserved.
The information contained herein is not therapeutic advice nor a substitute for therapy, and contacting Intimate Inquiries through this website does not establish a professional relationship.
1430 Larimer Street, Denver, CO 80202
Copyright © 2018 Intimate Inquiries. All rights reserved.
The information contained herein is not therapeutic advice nor a substitute for therapy, and contacting Intimate Inquiries through this website does not establish a professional relationship.